Quit Being So Picky

 Evidently there’s a parenting style out there where the Mom says to everyone in the house, “You will eat what I put in front of you or you will not eat.” Yeahhhh, soooo that wasn’t really my style but I didn’t even think about it until my son came along. See, my daughter was agreeable in this area (she later became EXTREMELY disagreeable in ALL other areas once she was like 13, but I digress). She’d eat whatever flavored rice, Shake-n-Bake chicken in a bag situation I put in front of her. Since I don’t even like second level veggies like brussel sprouts and that hateful lima bean, she was safe from my ever putting them on her plate. I stuck to the basics…broccoli, string beans, corn. You know... kid veggies. Well, here comes Sir Picky, King of the Beige Diet. If it wasn’t cheese pizza, grilled cheese or mac-n-cheese, he really had no use for it. I’d try to slip some ground turkey into his mac-n-cheese, just to end up watching him dig around in his mouth to extract the minuscule pieces of GROUND meat from the noodles. It was frustrating…and disgusting. It was a glorious day when he finally decided to eat a chicken nugget.  I would share this with other, rather judge-y mothers and they’d say anything from, “Oh, my Mark will eat anything I sit in front of him. I made a soufflé last week and he delightfully cleaned his plate” to my fave, “Oh, I don’t play that at my house! I’m not a short order cook! It’s meatloaf tonight or you can go to your room. You’ve got that Nikki! I don’t know how you do it!” Yeah, yeah, me either and I’m pissed but here I am…doing it. There are plenty of children who only have the choice of shrimp Oodles of Noodles or beef Oodles of Noodles and my raggedy kids are all, "TGI Fridays, Mom? Really? That's where you want to go? *sigh*, we sorta had a taste for Bravo but I guess we can try to find something on that menu." Oh, it gets better. My son would go over someone else’s house, or say camp and this boy would eat what they had. I’m talking casseroles, steak, things with actual color! Then the parent would report to me, “Yes, girl, he ate it all! Told me it was delicious, asked for seconds.”  Really? Dude, really? Then, as if this c-section didn't leave me scarred enough, he’d say, “Well, mom, SHE made it good.” Oh did she now? So, I’m just supposed to get this lip from my kids and NOT want to punch 'em? Whatever.